Why do we, as a society, want children to grow up so fast. Born, home fast, daycare, crawl, walk, talk, playdates, cartoons, Baby Einstein, kids golf clubs, a baseball glove, a parents expectation level, Kindergarten at 5. “There is no time to be a kid anymore Johnny, would you please cook dinner and look after your sister? Maybe throw in a load of wash or two?”
I’m just as guilty as anyone else I’m sure, but I’m beginning to recognize some things that just aren’t that important when it comes to a childs well being.
Little boy x gets upset because little boy y is a bully. Little boy x comes home from school all wound up. It takes him 45 minutes to calm down. What do you do?
A little girl gets in trouble because she “should” be potty trained by 2.33 years old. Why?
Kids need to make the cross of the A hit the middle dotted line to get perfect penmanship. Why? Ever see a doctor write?
Kindergarteners get homework?? Why? They can’t get it done during the day?
Does anyone have any answers? Anyone? Anyone?
Heap that stuff on top of a 5 year old and no wonder kids take lithium, prozac, have ADD/ADDHD. Kind of sad when you think about it over time.
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Theory #1: The 80's ushered in the "I can do it all, know it all and have it all" yuppies (now soccer moms and dads) that are now having kids and are teaching them this same set of "values" by overbooking their kids calendars with endless "quality" after- school activities. Let's hear the applause for parents who realize this is NOT the answer for real child development! (I have a friend/family like this, who decided to purchase a McMansion and thus turned into Theory #2)
Theory #2 (both parents work outside the home): No time and nothing that can be really done about it. Eight hours to work, 10 hours for kids to get a good night's sleep, 1-1.5 to commute, 1 for outside the home mundania, 1 for inside the home mundania, 1 for kids homework equals 22 hours a day. That's just existing. Throw into the mix an 1 hour a day (I'm being generous) watching the boob tube while kids are asleep, 1-2 hours a day for "outside activities" which is not a parent-child relationship nurturer if you ask me. Even more time needed for teenagers that want to spend "quality time" with their friends at the mall/on the internet, etc. I'm not even counting staying late at the office or a spouse that won't pull their weight. Throw in the stress that comes with living day to day and what does that leave us with? Guilt ridden overstressed parents and overweight/depressed kids. Oh that's right, another hour every so often for the much needed family therapy sessions or to take the kids to the doctor to make sure they are doing well on their ADD medication :coughhack:
Let's hear the applause for parents who make the effort to spend as much time as possible with their kids during the weekends, can actually sit down around the kitchen table for a real family dinner and for the ones who actually turn off the Boob Tube, internet, video games to spend time with their kids. Extra points if you've decided not to have a TV or other fluff in the home (yes, it can be done).
I've already raised my kids (not anywhere near the way I should have), as such will use my hindsight to bitch, moan and attempt to cure the ills of parenting with an insane air of insolence...oh cool, five o'clock - it's quittin' time!
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